On parenthetical (bee) non sequiturs

On looking over some of my earlier posts, I have concluded that I am prone to sudden uncontrollable attacks of parenthetical non sequiturs. ("Non sequiturs make me eat lampshades.") It is true that many of my favorite writers (Woody Allen, Kurt Vonnegut, Diet Cola) are masters of the non sequitur. Unlike me, they are not as inclined to use and overuse parentheses. (radar) True, both of them are successful and respected writers. I am not. In fact, most good writers avoid using parenthetical statements, at all. (MLA painted yellow toolbox.) This makes my own level of writing painfully obvious. (Diaspora filling the bathtub right now.) Still, I enjoy my little fits of absurdity. I can’t decide though if they are amusing (“Took you long enough to get here”, said the giraffe.) or just obnoxious. (Stop calling me.) To be perfectly honest, (as opposed to imperfectly dishonest/balloon!?) either choice works for me.