On horror movies

This is the time of year when I leave the television off. I don’t like horror movies. In particular, I dislike slasher movies. It isn’t so much that I find them to be scary. On the contrary, I see them as a combination of bad special effects combined with stories about stupid people doing predictably stupid things. I am reminded of the evening news.

I was wondering when the producers of horror movies are going run out of scary scenarios for their epics. They have exploited just about every frighteningly, unholy story line imaginable with the possible exception of an IRS audit or anther Britney Spears reality show. What other situation can they come up where normal people remain in abnormal conditions while supernaturally cunning, stealthy, and apparently, unstoppable forces cut them to pieces one at a time? I did see a special on one of the networks that showed some promise. It was called, "The Economic Plight of The Middle Class."

As for the more classic horror movies, I came me up with a really great idea for a remake of Hitchcock’s The Birds. I would set it in Asia. It would involve migratory birds and a cryptically named, H5N1 virus. Now, that’s one you wouldn’t see on the evening news.